IMUSA banner
home what's new contents join feedback about
Main News
Have your say

Contact us

Hold back the bullshit

For those of you who did not watch Knownowt, and his 3 selected sad-hacks on 20th August; it was revealed that UNITED FANS are to blame for Roy Keane not geting what he deserves. It seems that the Little Mancunians who fought so vociferously - and effectively - against the digger have only themselves to blame. Joke Smelling even had the gall to say that (on top of the £623M going into the shareholders back sacks) Keane would have been paid in a breath, and Rivaldo would have been wearing The Shirt by now!!

Now, you ask yourself, why should anyone get into a lather about a twilight chinwag between overweight over-opinionated neverweres on a minority sports channel. The sad fact is that these numbnuts are the filth that are dogging every orifice and sinew of the beautiful game for a scoop - a headline - an angle - anything so that they can sink their slavering fangs into the hand that overfeeds them. Back page headline 'Shock Horror Scoop' 'Newly-wed puts 2 fingers up at neanderthal thugs who abuse his bride' - pass the smelling salts Alice. Each so-called sports programme - particularly on sky - should have a Government Bullshit Warning.

The next angle they focused upon, was how United are now above the laws of the game. The FA are now taking a softly-softly approach to our heroes (and villains), as the result of OUR decision to go to Brazil. Now, those that know me know, I was never particularly taken in by the 'we beat the krauts - we did it for ingerland' national fever back in May. Fortunately, I was in Catalonia during most of the hysteria; although I would have liked to have been at the homecoming. (The best part of which must have been the suits looking out at the fevered 500,000 masses, getting to see their heroes' trophies, and not spending a bean on merchandise - OUCH!)

For the first time in living memory, fartin comes out with what most Reds are actually thinking, after the scousers' cup final last season. The schoolmaster is an absolute arse (ARSE?), and with time running out had to send off Mr. Bean for viciously hacking the ball away, from a certain goalscoring position - and keep up his apparent record (5 Reds booked, and at least 1 sent off per game). The fact that it was not necessary to strike a league winners medal, for him or any other gooner is immaterial. The personal cost to the gentleman from Cork was criminal. So, apparently, the FA have 'let off' fartin from a charge of bringing the game into disrepute (!?) - but, woe betide anyone else. How many of us would have settled for a savage example to be made - pour decourager les autres? This means that there will be an easy ride for the rest of the season, or until FIFA confirm that South Africa have the 2006 World Cup, whichever is the sooner. Don't hold your breath, lads and lasses.

This week saw what many of us have been hoping for through most of the 90's - the vicelike grip of the suits around the neck of the goose that laid the golden egg. Having snatched away footie from the people, the Jeremys and Jemimas are slowly realising that there are other things to be seen doing and that perhaps the reason why that hairy ape on SOOOOOOOPERSUNDAY is not actually creaming himself at the fare on display. After years of being pushed away from the game, the plebs are actually not prepared to stump up 30-odd notes to watch spurs - or more for the rent-boys in the euro qualifiers. The bubble may be about to burst. With any luck, they will be off with the booty like startled rabbits, and we will get our game back; poorer in funds maybe, but richer in spirit. We can all dream. D

The views expressed on this page are the views of the individual contributor and do not necessarily reflect the views of the IMUSA.